Happy September

I don't know what is more troubling, that during our shoe shopping excursion tonight Kennedy immediately went to the Sketchers brand ("THESE ARE SKETCHERS!") or that she is now in a size 11 shoe. With laces! You might remember a previous post about the tall variety, which she certainly does not need and did not get. These, however, make her run faster, jump higher, and look stylin'.

It is the first day of September and that means that I should quit blogging and return to birthday party preparations and planning for grandmama's visit. Twice a year I wish we had a guest room, and this is one of those times. I did make a cute little nook in the office across from the foldout love seat though:


Isn't it cute? And nookish?
And here are the dogs getting fur all over the office foldout love seat:

Yes that is her tongue....

“Irreverent and captivating.”

That about sums it up, thanks Amazon.com. Heather Armstrong, blogger extraordinaire, made an appearance last night at Austin’s BookPeople for a reading and book signing for It Sucked And Then I Cried: How I Had a Baby, a Breakdown, and a Much Needed Margarita. When Turner volunteered to pick up Kennedy from school so I could go, I almost cried myself! I thought: I can mosey on down to the book store, have a cup of coffee, browse around, maybe pop in to Anthropology next door, get some much needed alone time….. No. By the time I fought traffic, purchased the book, and realized that this was an EVENT, with wristbands, lines, and hundreds of mom’s vying for the best seat in the house, I decided to just grab a folding chair and sit and wait. Luckily for me, I sat next to someone with a kindle and got to stare enviously at this strange new contraption. Everyone around her was oohing and aahing, asking for a better look. It was pretty slick, I must say.

I digress….. So, at 7 p.m., Heather is intro"dooce"d (ha ha). She came down the stairs, big-belly-pregnant with her hubby, Jon, by her side. I think that surprised everyone, and it was really nice that he came. It made the reading that much more entertaining watching the two of them interact in bizarre Armstrong fashion.

First she read a passage from her book about sex after vaginal birth. (Hysterical.)

Then she read her favorite blog post from the past year, about slapping sheep butt. (Cute.)

Then there was an audience Q&A which lasted about 45 minutes. Some of the best questions: Do you feel like a celebrity now? She said sometimes, when she’s recognized in her hometown of Salt Lake City. When I met her at the signing table, I said, “You know you’re a celebrity if you’re on Oprah!” She looked so humbled, like she didn’t want to believe it, but its true! You & I aren’t on Oprah and probably never will be, right? She was also asked some writing questions, like how do you come up with content. She said writer’s block is hard, physically painful even, and that music helps. As for her awesome photography, she revealed her house is usually that clean, but sometimes she photoshops out dog hair and has been known to trim her dog’s nails this way as well. That’s what’s so endearing about her – you’re left wondering what’s more bizarre: that she spends half an hour digitally removing her dog’s toenails instead of just clipping them, or that she openly admits to doing so?

Pot Belly

Whenever I walk by her, I have to do a double take. She looks like a stitched up pot-bellied pig. She had a skin tumor removed last Tuesday, but is healing nicely. The doctor called to tell us that it isn't likely this tumor spread anywhere else, which is great news. It cost a fortune for that peace of mind though. Damn dogs....

Stay Away!

Stay Away!, originally uploaded by melissa.coats.

One ornament down, 500 to go. I may be regretting putting the tree up so early this year....

We Call Her Moose

There's a really cute kids book, What Pete Ate from A-Z. This has been my life for the last four months. If it is within her jaw's reach, Jolie will eat it. More precisely, she will chew it and/or shred it to bits. I myself have lost some shoes and a bra. The house has lost some carpet and a baseboard. But the most common victims are Kennedy's toys. Small dolls, doll's clothes, shoes, crayons, marker caps, stuffed animals, tea sets. They must taste like child sugar to her or something. The worst part is, she is so stealth, and by the time I realize she has something, it's destroyed. I am constantly picking up things I think she'll find appealing-it's never ending. And of course she has a basket full of traditional, boring dog chew toys (she has one in the photo above, but chewed on that rug not long after the picture was taken). I'm at my wit's end with this dog. She's smart and loving and adorable, but I need some kind of Dog Whisperer intervention, quick. (Turner got some kind of bitter spray, but I can't very well spray down everything our daughter touches. Or can I?) Our other dog, Olive, never chewed a thing. She's looking at us now like "Ya'll deserve it, bringing this moose into my house."